


Trace The Constellations

by SuperMagicalWizard



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series), Thomas Sanders
Genre: Anxiety, Gen, Nightmare mention, Pre-Episode: Accepting Anxiety, breathing problems because of anxiety
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-25
Updated: 2018-11-25
Packaged: 2019-08-29 00:38:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 764
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16733700
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SuperMagicalWizard/pseuds/SuperMagicalWizard
Summary: (Before Accepting Anxiety)Anxiety had a bad dream so he leaves his room to calm himself down while the others sleep peacefully.





	Trace The Constellations

**Author's Note:**

> This was the first thing I wrote after a long time so I hope you like it ^-^

“ _ **No!**_ ” Anxiety screamed as he lurched awake from another nightmare, heart racing as he clutched his chest. He couldn’t breathe, his lungs aching as they tried to draw in air. It had been such a bad dream, such a fear filled dream. For a second he just focused on what had happened, what he had _seen_ happen, and his breath caught in his throat. _No no no no._ He flinched, curling up as he wished desperately for it not to be true _please don’t be true-_

“Just a dream,” he whispered, voice raspy and breathless as he rubbed the fabric of his shirt against his chest in an effort to ground himself. “Just a dream-”

_Stupid. You’re freaking out over nothing! It wasn’t even real! And even if it was why would you care if Morality-_

_“_ Stop _,_ ” he mumbled, lungs starting to ache again.

_They don’t care about you_

“That’s- That’s okay,” he whispered with effort.

_They **hate** you_

“I know,” he whispered softly, finally managing to take a staggeringly deep breath.

_You should just-_

“No,” he interrupted the voice, continuing to take shaky breaths as he slowly got out of bed, his legs trembling under him. “Not today.”

After a few moments he stood in front of his door, his fingers gently rubbing his familiar hoodie’s sleeves.

“I can do this,” he told himself, not giving himself a chance to overthink it before turning the handle. “I _can_.”

 

The house was quiet. The others had gone to bed hours ago, or at least he hoped they had. He’d been locked in his room for a few days so he really didn’t know. But he hoped. Because right now he couldn’t promise that seeing one of them wouldn’t lead him straight into another panic attack.

_Pathetic_

“I know,” he whispered, fingers tapping on his wrist as he counted breaths to try to calm his heart. “I know.”

He slowly made his way down the hallway.Creativity’s room was dark, faint music coming from it but nothing else. When he passed in front of Logic’s mostly dark room he heard a voice and froze for a second, thinking he had been caught, before realizing it was just the narrations of an audiobook. So he kept walking. Morality’s room held the soft glow of his fairy lights and the gentle tune of a lullabye. Anxiety stood in front of the door for a few seconds, listening to the soft familiar melody before quietly continuing his journey.

He made his way to the stairs without much trouble and took a breath before lightly stepping forward. The stairs creaked under his feet and he flinched.

_Stupid_

He nodded. He already knew that. That didn’t stop him from pausing on every creak to listen if any of the others had been woken up though. After a few minutes he was finally at the bottom of the stairs, legs still shaking but not quite as much anymore. He looked around and for the first time in a while he relaxed a little, comforted by the dark and empty room. After a brief pause he quickly made his way over to the big window next to the kitchen and didn’t waste a second before curling up in the window sill.

 

The window was cold against his arm as he leaned against it and started to look at the stars. He could remember Logic talking about them. He could remember Logic’s steady voice naming the stars and constellations and galaxies, could remember how happy it always made him when he did. Anxiety’s fingertips silently traced the constellations as he tried to remember each of Logic’s stories.

For a second the voice in his head was almost silent.

_You’re pathetic_

It whispered and he smiled a little, leaning his head against the cold pane of glass. The memory of Logan’s voice still playing in his mind as he traced the sky with his cold fingers.

“I know.”

 

Hours later Anxiety would wake up again to Morality’s faked concern and Creativity’s loud voice filled with disgust and insults and he would flee back to his room. He wouldn’t not even notice Logic’s tired and confused face as he ran past him and slammed his door, slowly sinking to the ground as he tried to calm himself. 

 

For now though, he just yawned. His mind was filled with Logic’s soothing voice and the cold glass against his fingers comforted him as he slowly, slowly traced and retraced the constellations. Soon enough, he was asleep, and for once the dreams actually stayed away. It was peaceful.


End file.
